Advice For Dudes: Online Dating

Are you a dude on an online dating site? Are you having trouble getting women to actually go out with you? Not sure why? The problem may be you!

Be an Original:  On an online dating site, you’re one dude in a crowded virtual room. If you want to get one-on-one time with the ladies, you’re going to have to stand out from the rest of the pack. If your profile describes you as “nice,” “outgoing,” “friendly,” “sincere,” “funny,” “kind,” “adventurous,” or “hard working,” we probably fell asleep before we finished reading it. Next! Do you know how many other guys use those exact same words?

Get It Right:  Women read anything into everything. But you knew that already, right? Checking out your profile, we’re looking over your stats, we’re eying your pictures, we’re scanning your prose. We’re trying to get a sense of who you are through every detail. Because this is a buyers’ market (ours!), we’re looking for a reason to exclude you. Take the time to polish your profile. A spell-checked, grammatically correct, well-written profile shows us you’re on the ball personally and professionally, not some ne’er-do-well living in his mother’s basement. While you’re at it, don’t fudge the facts. 

Making a Move:  We know it’s not easy hitting on a chick. Unfortunately, that doesn’t make us any more merciful. Start off with a lame line, and we’re bound to shoot you down or, worse yet, ignore you. “How was your weekend?” “You seem like an interesting person.” “How are you today?” Bo-ring. “Do you have any pictures of yourself in a bikini?” Pervert alert! “If you go out with me, I’ll be eternally grateful.” Yeah, um, no. You know what scores with women? Specificity. Take the time to get to know her virtually and respond specifically to something in her profile. 

Real-Time Dating:  Don’t email us forever. Get on with it already! We’re going to know within the first five minutes of meeting you if you’re the guy for us or not. When we’ve gone back and forth via email for long enough to get comfortable, ask us out on a no-pressure date. Drinks or dinner. No movies or beach trip. Follow the golden rule: K.I.S.S. (Keep It Simple, Stupid.) If you ask her out, and she hesitates significantly, turns you down, or blows you off, move on to the next one. If we don’t jump at the bait, we’re probably not really that interested. Once you’re in the room together, well, that’s on you, buddy. Just keep one thing in mind: Making a girl laugh is one of the surest ways to win her heart.